The Final Countdown

Over the past few years, TV has become less of a form of entertainment and more like a form of torture. The airwaves have been cluttered with mind-numbingly awful sitcoms, scores of CSI and Law & Order clones, and an unrelenting torrent of reality shows that are so bottom-of-the-barrel putrid, they leave you begging for more mind-numbingly awful sitcoms and CSI and Law & Order clones. Anything that's even remotely interesting is swiftly and quietly taken out back and put down.

But every season I come back, with the hopes that one of those good shows might last a season or two. No matter how many times I've been beat down, I always come back. Network TV is the Ike to my Tina.

And you know what? For the first few weeks of this season, I thought this time really was going to be different. I mean, would the old network TV even let a show like My Name is Earl make it on the air, let alone pick it up for the whole season? There's no laugh track. There's only one camera. Just like a certain other great show that had just happen to get the nod for a third season. Yes, after a summer of uncertainty, Arrested Development came back. See, TV had changed!

Silly, stupid Tina.

I guess I have no one to blame but myself for the shiner I got this afternoon. Of course, I could blame the network geniuses at FOX, who apparently have no idea how to handle an Emmy-winning, critically-acclaimed comedy. In hindsight, perhaps premiering the third season opener against a special Hurricaine Katrina relief telethon edition of Monday Night Football, then pulling the show for several weeks in favor of the lowest-rated World Series in television history were not the greatest ways to attract new veiwers. To their credit, they did show two episodes back-to-back this week, it's first week back since the WS, and apparently last until some time in December. But hey, Stacked! is coming back!

Tim Kring isn't off the hook, either. Who's Tim Kring, you ask? Only the writer of a little movie called Teen Wolf Too. To this day, simply mentioning "Jason Bateman" will cause some people to set themselves on fire and jump out the nearest window. Those poor, jaded souls probably never even gave Arrested Development a chance. It's a shame, because they're really missing out. Plus, they're on fire.

But really, most of the blame lays squarely on the shoulders of the veiwing public. How many times have your co-workers told you about this show, only to have you say you'll "get around" to watching it? Maybe you've even chuckled at the name Bob Loblaw (and by the way, if you haven't, you're some kind of robot), or at the opening line of his commercial, "Why should you go to jail for a crime that someone else...noticed?" Maybe you stopped while flipping through the channels one night and thought to yourself, "Hey, is that Super Dave? I'm pretty sure that's Super Dave. Why does he have a camera on his head? Huh. That's weird. Oooh! Navy Seals!"

In the end, it's probably for the best. With any luck, Arrested Development will land on HBO, possibly coupled with Curb Your Enthusiasm, where it will collect mounds of awards and hopefully work in a ton of jokes at FOX's expense. Are you listening, HBO? Even with the low ratings AD's getting now, it's bound to do better than The Comeback.

If you've still never seen the show, the first and second seasons are available on DVD. You can even buy the second season from the sidebar over there and help me out a little. I don't want to try to sway your decision, but Brianna sleeps on the floor. Anyway, once you're all caught up, you can check out the o.p. and join the ranks of AD fans. FOX may not realize it, but there are dozens of us. Dozens!