Wednesday, January 31, 2007


This morning a lot of Boston commuters were late for work, thanks to a suspicious package found under a bridge near I-93. The "package," newspapers reported, had tubes and wires sticking out of it and was eventually contained and neutralized. After the device was safely detonated and determined to not be an explosive device, everyone breathed a sigh of relief and went on with their lives.

Until a few hours later, when another package was found under another bridge. And then another. At least five packages were found, all under bridges. What the heck was going on? Why were they all under bridges? Were we being attacked by trolls?

Sirens went off all over the city. People started to panic. A press conference was scheduled for 4 PM, with both the mayor and governor set to address the rash of suspicious devices.

Here's a photo of one of the "packages":

And here's one of the "packages" under a bridge at night (sorry, all i could get was a link).

During the press conference, the mayor said the devices were "inert" and was calling the whole thing a hoax, but warned citizens that if they say any of these devices to call 911.

I know that our authorities and political leaders more than likely have never heard of Adult Swim, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, or even guerrilla marketing. And being a major metropolitan area ripe for terrorist attacks can make anyone a little jumpy. But couldn't anyone have thought to go on the internet, where they'd find that this things are popping up in cities all over the country? Here's one in Philly, which actually references one of the ones in Boston, as well as mentioning them appearing in New York, San Francisco, Los Angeles , Atlanta, Chicago, Philly, Portland, Miami, Seattle, and Boston. And they've been up for TWO TO THREE WEEKS! But as far as I know, we're the only ones that blew them up. Way to go, Boston.

UPDATE: Turner Broadcasting has issued an apology for the ad campaign.

ANOTHER UPDATE: Well, that didn't take long...

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Wednesday is Fun Fact Day

Fun fact: As of the writing, a Google search for "It's the meers" brings up about 59 results, including one from Commercials I, a website I spent about an hour and a half reading today.

Update: It's now up to 279.

Monday, January 08, 2007

That Time of Year

Despite years of research and billions of dollars in government grants, scientists are still baffled by Joe's uncanny ability to work an old TV show called Captain Nice, into a conversation. Upon mentioning Captain Nice, he will offer a nugget like, "It starred Mr. Feeny", before switching the subject to another obscure short-lived TV series, Mr. Terrific. Perhaps most amazingly, every time this nostalgia bug bites him, he has absolutely no recollection of any of the previous times he's mentioned the same thing, virtually word for word, yet he can remember that the Cap'n's secret identity was Carter Nash.

Since 2001, when we both started working here, he's brought up Captain Nice and Mr. Terrific at least once a year. Most times he's testing John T. on his memory of old TV shows. Today, roughly the sixth he brought it up in as many years, he brought up Captain Nice because he wants to find the series on DVD. And just to keep the pattern going, he said he'd also like to find Mr. Terrific. The last time he asked John T. if he remembered them, I actually called him out on it, telling him that even though they were on before I was born and I'd never seen an episode, I felt like I knew all about them because this was like the fifth time he'd talked about them. He looked surprised.

I know (but I wish I didn't) they debuted on rival networks on the same night one right after the other, and they both aired their last episode on the same night seven months later. And for some reason, I know that while they both lasted only one season, Captain Nice is generally regarded as the better of the two. And bonus points for his costume, which may or may not have been the basis for USA Network's old b-movie host Commander USA. Probably not, though.

Anyway, This time Joe was in T's office and I was standing in the doorway. Once again, after saying he wanted to find the DVDs, Joe asked if he remembered Mr. Terrific. Then he looked at me and said, "You wouldn't remember, you're too young." Pretty much the exact same thing he said last time. And the time before. Without a trace of evidence that he remembered this conversation from any of the previous times we've had it. At least the first time I legitimately hadn't ever heard of either Captain Nice or Mr. Terrific. Now I feel like I'm they're friggin' biographers.

Incidentally, there are inexplicably more than a few pages out there dedicated to the defunct duo. Study them. Learn them. Try not to giggle like a schoolgirl when one of the pages incorrectly refers to William Daniels, voice of TV's KITT, appearing in a show called Boy Meets Boy. Use this information well. If you ever meet Joe in a dark alley and he starts waxing nostalgic for the caped exploits of Carter Nash and Stanley Beamish, and you're out of pepper spray, overwhelm him with your encyclopedic knowledge until he goes away. At least until next year.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

See You in Hell, 2006!

I'm just going to come out and say it. I like chai. And green tea. And flavored coffee. I used to get embarrassed ordering anything that wasn't plain coffee, until I heard Joe call french vanilla a "fruity drink" and realized that's just stupid. Funny how you don't really notice that something is dumb until you hear Joe say it.

There's no end to the weird flavors they keep coming up with for coffee and tea, but has anyone ever thought of combining coffee and tea? Imagine coffee-flavored tea, or tea-flavored coffee. Cofftea. Or Teaffee. Why am I not working on developing this right now? It's a goldmine. Goldmine, I say!

Crap. Apparently several hundred people beat me to it. Aw, my millions. Oh well. At least the Spare Change Guy is doing alright for himself... br>
Panhandler arrested three times in one week
By Danielle Ameden/Daily News Correspondent
Tuesday, January 02, 2007

FRAMINGHAM - "Spare Change Guy" is making a name for himself.

Trying to add a little jingle to his pockets, John Bubier was arrested for panhandling Sunday, just four days after he was nabbed for pulling the same stunt twice in one day.

"He's kind of crusty," said police spokesman Lt. Paul Shastany. "He doesn't take well to being told enough is enough."

Bubier, 53, of 12 Lexington St., apt. 24, was charged with disorderly conduct on a person and resisting arrest. Shastany said the man was soliciting spare change from drivers downtown before his arrest at 2:23 p.m.

"He was walking in the traffic again at the intersection of (routes) 135 and 126, stopping cars and asking for money - panhandling," Shastany said. "When the officers arrived, they caught him doing that."

"The cars would slow down because there's a pedestrian in the road and, obviously, they don't want to strike him," he said. "He goes to the driver's door or windows and asks for money."

When police tried to take Bubier into custody, he would not cooperate. "He was kind of obstinate," Shastany said.

He said Bubier always has the same trick up his sleeve, and has even pulled his shenanigans on camera.

"He's always a fixture on Beacon Hill at (the) Fox News studio," Shastany said. "When V.B. (Goudie) the reporter does his commentary, this guy is frequently seen in the background and interviewed at times."

"That's Spare Change Guy," he said. "He's infamous ... a pain in the neck."

On Wednesday, Bubier was arrested at 11:46 a.m. on a charge for disorderly conduct, released on personal recognizance, and then arrested again at 2:45 p.m. for the same thing, police said.

For his latest charges, Bubier was scheduled to be arraigned today in Framingham District Court.

Check out the link to this story for a picture of SCG.

See? Sure, he got arrested, but he's got an apartment. Things are looking up.