Hope You're Havin' Fun With the Bean Bag

It's only been a week since I last saw Wah-Kee, but a lot changed in that week. He met a hairdresser and they went on a date. I don't know if he met her at a party and then got a haircut, or he asked her out while she was doing his hair. All I knew is what Jose told me: that his Chinese guy mullet is no more and he now looks like a boy band member, circa 1999. I got to see it myself at his birthday party Friday night.

I got him a card with some money and a printout of a website I found, www.wah-kee.com. It's a Chinese food place in Madison, WI.

Michele dropped Brianna off at my parent's house and we went over to Jose's place. Nick, Hedie, Wah-Kee and his hair showed up about half an hour later. Huh. He now has short hair with little brown streaks all over the place. He says it's "bleached." It looks like some kid took a burnt umber crayon and went to town on his head. Here's hoping it works out and she's not just using him as a guinea pig for her weird hair experiments.



A little later on Ali and Catlin showed up. For the longest time Jose was obsessed with Ali, even though she constantly shot him down and basically treated him like crap. Wah-Kee liked Catlin, then he may or may not have had something with Ali. That was during the summer, and I guess it put Nick, Jose and Wah-Kee's friendships in danger. I'm not sure when this turned into Melrose Place. I missed a lot, being a whole town away and all.

We spent the night watching a Ron White DVD, drinking some cheap yet magical Boone's Farm green liquor, and playing Taboo and Hoopla well into the night. I called the green stuff "inspiration juice," but it didn't really help my game at all. It didn't hinder it, either. Turns out I just choke whenever I'm playing a board game. We used to play Clue at Nick's house. I won the first two games, and I haven't won since. I once said "Hello, old man" after getting Col. Mustard. If you ever play Clue, don't do that. And then there was the whole Miss White ordeal. I hate her.

The party was great. Catlin got Wah-Kee a giant pair of granny panties that she told him were hers. We all had a good time, although every once in a while Jose had to remind us to keep it down so the neighbors wouldn't complain. By the time we left it was too late to wake up Brianna, so we went back to my parent's house for the night.

On Saturday Michele and I went into Boston to go Christmas shopping. We spent most of the day there, but nothing worth mentioning here. I guess if I was a chick I'd say something like "Omigod, I saw the cutest pair of shoes!" But really not much happened. It was just nice to be alone together for awhile.

During the train ride home, I kept hearing this weird noise. It was a little boy's voice. I couldn't make out what he was saying right away; only the "ding-DONG" rhythm he was saying it in. The doors on the train make the same noise before they open. At first, it sounded like "green beans."

green beans,
green beans...

He kept doing that. The whole time. Eventually, I could hear him better, and he was actually saying "bean bag". It was some kind of song. Or unholy chant, I'm not really sure.

bean bean,
bean bag
bean bean,
bean bag
hope you're havin' fun with the be-ean bag,
hope you're havin' fun with the be-ean bag
bean bean,
bean bag...

We got back to my parents house and picked up Brianna, who had been watching tapes of soap operas with my mom. Apparently she watched them Friday, too. She was all into it. She said "Chloe was in an accident, but she's still alive!" I told her it was time to go, but she said she wanted to find out "what happens to Chloe and the baby." My mom said the baby was actually on a different soap. My God. Two days and she's addict to daytime TV.

Despite everything that happened this weekend, all I can think about is that damn bean bag song. It just keeps playing over and over in my head.

bean bean,
bean bag
bean bean,
bean bag
hope you're havin' fun with the be-ean bag,
hope you're havin' fun with the be-ean bag

That kid's going to haunt my dreams.

kid: You must kill your neighbor's dog. So says the bean bag.
Me: Yes, master. All hail the mighty bean bag. Bean bean, bean bag...