Gasification, Baby!

It seems eda's been chatting up a whole bunch of people. Spreading her provocative artistry here, here, even here, on this Spanish-language rock & roll blog. But eda's a ghost; wiped from existence again and again. In all instances, only references to her sexy trouser poetry remain. I guess the world isn't ready to jump wireless the egg.

With eda nowhere to be found, I feared that I would never learn the meaning of "gasification baby." Thankfully, I found tootoomart.com, which appears to be China's answer to Amazon.com. Tootoomart doesn't dabble in anything as ribald as sexy T-shaped trousers, but they do sell inflatable Minnie Mouse chairs for children to fart on.



They even have big name sponsors. Check out this banner ad for the movie 2012:



I have to admit, I thought that movie looked pretty stupid, but that tagline really pulled me in. I might have to rent it afterall.

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It Puts the Dring in the Basket

Apparently more people read this thing than just you guys. I guess that means I have to update more. Lousy new people.

So here's one that's been in the queue for a while, because I couldn't really think of a good intro. All you need to know is Brianna's school had a fundraiser, so she brought home a catalog for us to bring to work and see if anyone sees anything they might want. There was actually some pretty cool looking things in there, not the crappy magazine subscriptions we were forced to shill. My mom bought a trivet. Here are the instructions that were printed on the back of the box.

INSTRUCTION

1. HEAT PRESERVATION WHILE HEATING

PUT THE MARBLE SIDE UP, HEAT AS FOLLOWS:

POWER OF THE MICROSTOVE

600-900W 3-5MIN

1000-1500W 2-4MIN

NOTE: DIFFERENT POWER AND DESIGN OF THE MICROSTOVE WILL LEAD TO DIFFERENT HEATING
TIME. IF THE WARM PLATE DO NOT HOT AFTER HEATING UPON THE ABOVE MINUTES, YOU CAN HEAT
A BIT MORE TO REACH THE TEMPERATURE YOU NEED.

PUT BOWL OR SOMETHING ELSE WHICH YOU WANT TO KEEP WARM ON THE HEATED PLATE.

CAUTION:

A. THE TEMPERATURE RANGE IS +130C TO -20C. OVER HEAT WILL LEAD TO MELTING OF THE PLASTIC HOLDER.

B. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH STONE ON BOTTOM OF THE PLATE WHEN HOT. ALWAYS HOLD BY HANDLES.

2. HEAT PRESERVATION WHILE COOLING

FREEZE IT FOR MORE THAN 4 HOURS THEN TAKE OUT, PUT THE DRING YOU WANT COOLING ON THE MARBLE.

Now I don't know how to wrap up. There's not really a whole lot to say, I guess.

Oh wait, I found virtually the same description online, except "dring" now says "drink" which is only marginally more coherent. It still says "If the warm plate do not hot enough..."

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