Don't Read This

18 days ago, I mentioned something about doing a Joe post. Then work got busy again so any hopes of hearing new Joe-isms were crashed. And now for the past few days I've had a cold. Nothing too bad, just a little coughing, lots of sneezing (at least 1 in 5 with gross, mucusy projectiles), and a constant nose drip. I mean literally CONSTANT. It refuses to stop running. How much more can possibly be in there? I'm starting to fear that eventually, my nose and, maybe even my entire head, will just dry up, shrivel and fall off. I tore through a box of Kleenex yesterday, but all I have to show for it is a trash barrel filled with hardened, crumpled up tissues and the assurance that in a couple of days, I'm going to have those gross sores all under my nose. But I've just made a medical breakthrough....

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Purple Monkey Dishwasher

For some reason, TV executives seem to think that shows with ongoing storylines are bad. People would rather casually watch a string of standalone episodes rather than seeing a serialized plot drawn out over several episodes, seasons, or God forbid, the entire run of the show. Apparently, people who don't watch any given show regularly may sit down to watch one day, but rather than being drawn into the story, they're confused by the addition of a character than wasn't on when they last caught the show months earlier. Worried that they'll lose these casual viewers, they flood the schedule with filler episodes, significantly limiting the number of episodes devoted to the show's ongoing story arch and effectively pissing off all the people who actually tune in every week. Enough with the pointless...

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The Weather is a Bastard

I feel like there's an update on everyone's favorite unfrozen caveman designer in the near future. A lot has happened in the past few months. For instance, did I mention we have a new employee here at Where I Work, Inc.? And that it's a lady-type? Well, there is and she is. There was some lively discussion a few years ago as to whether Joe would shy away from blurting out such nuggets as "suck me off" and "everyone wants to lick me" if we ever got a female mixed back into the previously all-male staff, and if he didn't, whether it would driver her away screaming into the night. I have the answers to those questions and more, including what this is all about. But first, I want to talk about the weather. Back in January, the trees in the public garden started blooming because it was so unseasonably...

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